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I Have Commitment Issues Not in a relationship way (although that�s never really been tested), but in a sticking to one hobby type of way. I�d really like to get a hobby that I�m really good at. Of course to be really good at it you�d have to practise a lot and I�m just too gosh darn impatient for that. So instead I go out and try a dozen different things of which none of them stick with me for life. Well, I have my writing but I don�t show it to anyone so how is that going to be a guaranteed hobby that I�m good at. I�ve got the acting but I don�t want to do that full time cause it�s never a guaranteed income and I don�t look like Nicole Kidman. I have the tapestries that are half finished and sitting at the bottom of my wardrobe. I have the swimming cossie that�s crying out for a dunking. I have all these half finished, half hearted, half arsed things going on and I can�t commit to any of them, although I ment (sic) to. I went ice skating on Saturday night. All this winter Olympic fever has got me to thinking that I can become a medal winning ice dancer. But the main obstacle was that I hate ice skating. I�ve hating it since I can remember. We went with school once and I think I went once around the rink clutching onto the wall and then sat down to mind everyone�s gear. The main reason is that I don�t want to risk fingers being cut off, my arse getting wet and the fact that I would blush the colour of a Turkish flag (without the little yellow symbols of course) if I fell over. But I decided, what the heck, I�ll embarrass myself. I�ll go ice skating with 5 other people, Elmo who has had lessons, can skate backwards and has played ice hockey; Chook, Lel Belle and Dazza who seem to know their way around the rink and another wall clinger like myself. I�m proud to say that I left the wall and skated around the rink twice by myself without stopping. The ironic bit being that I don�t know how to stop yet, but there is always time for that. At the moment I�m quite happy with the slamming into the wall as a stopping mechanism. I did much skating with the clinging of hands of Lel Belle and Chook and Elmo even pushed me round the rink like I was a kid in a stroller so I could experience the thrill of speed and also the horror of seeing a corner approaching. I really want to go skating every week now. I wanna get my own skates. I wanna get a funky little outfit with wispy bits coming off it. But it�ll never happen. Cause the bruises on my legs from the shoes will remind me that I don�t wanna do it again, plus my �commitment� issues. Never gonna hear that Australia has won a gold medal in ice dancing Tyd And after reading back over this entry I think I also have coherencey issues. Sigh.25 February 2002 - 10:55 am |
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